


Tractorbeam Christmas timestamp

by Chash



Series: Tractorbeam [2]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-29
Updated: 2011-09-29
Packaged: 2017-10-24 04:04:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/258803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chash/pseuds/Chash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: Sheldon/Leonard!Jensen and Penny!Jared's first Christmas together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tractorbeam Christmas timestamp

**Author's Note:**

> Written for juice817.

"You know it's not really Jesus's birthday," says Jensen darkly.

"I know," says Jared. He's hanging lights, which Jensen appreciates because his t-shirt is too small and it's riding up. Jensen is pretty sure Jared has the most perfect back in the universe. He tried to prove this mathematically, but Chad debunked it by managing to use the same formula to prove that Jensen had the greatest breasts in the world, so he's given up and acknowledged that his love for Jared Padalecki is perhaps not completely scientifically justifiable. Mostly, he takes it on faith.

"And that Christmas was made to lure pagans away from their own solstice celebrations into the cult of Christianity."

"I know," says Jared.

"And that--"

"Jensen," says Jared patiently. "If you dis Christmas one more time, I'm going to call your mom and tell her you called Christianity a cult."

Jensen thinks this is completely unfair. Jensen can't be rational in the face of his mother's logic. No one can do that. It's impossible. And Jared knows it, because Jensen spent an hour on the phone with his mother explaining how Jared 1. was real and 2. worked in food service and couldn't get long enough off at Christmas to head back to Texas and therefore Jensen wasn't leaving either, before he had given up in a huff and told Jared to talk to her.

Jared, of course, had turned on the charm and told Jensen's mother how much he loved Jensen until Jensen was sure parts of his body that did not actually exist were blushing. The conversation had concluded with Jensen's mother thinking Jared was the best thing since sliced bread (Jensen personally thinks that probably sliced bread happened around the same time as the Laws of Thermodynamics, and that those are much more impressive, but his mother won't hear of this) and Jared knowing that Jensen was terrified of his own mother.

It was a dangerous combination.

"It just has some faults," says Jensen. "As a holiday."

"It's got some pros too, you know," says Jared. He steps back to survey his lights. They're shaped like _cacti_. Jensen doesn't understand where any of Jared's possessions came from.

"You shouldn't need an excuse to give presents," says Jensen.

"You don't," says Jared. "Any time you want to buy me something pretty, go ahead," he adds with a grin.

"I just don't like it," says Jensen. "For completely rational reasons."

"Uh huh," says Jared. "Your mom told me about your traumatic Santa experience."

Jensen swears under his breath. "I checked. I have post-traumatic stress disorder."

Jared puts his arm around Jensen. "I don't blame you. If I sat on Santa's lap and he had a hard-on? I'd be fucked up too."

"I'm not fucked up!" Jensen protests. "I'm justifiably wary."

"Of course, if I found out later it was actually a _candy bar_..."

"There was no way of knowing that at the time," says Jensen darkly.

Jared nuzzles behind his ear. "You know what I like about Christmas?"

Jensen can guess pretty well, based on Jared's personality. "Presents, family, food, the general feeling of goodwill towards men..."

Jared bites his ear. "Mistletoe."

Jensen swallows. "We don't have mistletoe."

"I'm using my imagination," says Jared, and kisses him anyway.

Jensen has to admit, Christmas is looking up this year.


End file.
